The Stories They Told Us to Keep to Ourselves

I know that I should go to sleep
but I’m thinking about a wednesday night
and my hypomanic brain is
strung out and on overdrive

there were fingers like missiles
in the dark. I beat a war cry against his
back. My Indian God,
who thought my No was the
liking kind of no. And I pulled

the white thread around
his torso (Janaeu, for Chastity)
like it was a

panic cord, and the next time
he kissed me
my lips were salty.

But we finished the Shiraz and I
didn’t throw him out.

I don’t want to be one of those girls
who load words into
their guns with a click. There, look

assault goes into the chamber

He said:
Can I see you again, when
I come back to Hong Kong? And I

said, uncertainly,
Yes. Now when he says he misses me
I am a twisting fish
struggling against the mouth of a bear.

These aren’t my words, but –

I never met a man who loved me so much at first sight he had to hurt me to do it

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About fiercemissc

Twenty-something Geordie girl living and working in Hong Kong. Young, free and single and making the most of it.
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